some time ago

my brother, "pa, Lim Kit Siang got Facebook -leh..."
my papa, "i also have, i use it in my office only -mah..."
my brother, "you know what is Facebook -meh..."
my papa, "of course -lah, it's a book where you put your face in..."

=.=" "ha ha ha" -_-"

confessions

i don't think i've gotten over the misery of the A2 examinations. i should feel relieved that i've completed this tremendously-horrible-nightmare that has been haunting me for one and a half years, Cambridge A-Level, but yet, i feel no euphoria sweeping right through me, like a gush of strong wind, where's the wind? where is it? it's missing. i still feel occupied like, words and thoughts teeming in my mind, "opps, when is the next exam?" "why am i so free now? it feels awkwardly weird. " i guess the wicked pre-u programme has really intoxicated my mind. argghhhh!!!

see, i have to get used to the freedom i'm having now. i have to make myself believe that i can actually sit down and watch TV the whole day without being bothered by homeworks, books that await me to be read, or even assignments and Maths papers. *wooooh* freedom is enjoyable and yet it might be even miserable. how ironic.

it seems unbelievable that i'm on my way to my dreams. my hands reaching out towards the stars i've been attracted to since when i was a little child, being offered into a medical school. "i believe i can fly, i believe i can touch the sky..." it doesn't seem impossible at all. nevertheless, a tinge of unsureness always seems to cover my vision. but somehow, there would be times, me comforting myself...

mr. cupido

now i must get back to Tomb Raider... =P

Sunway Pyramid Take 2 :: 14/06/08

i woke up at the break of dawn, it's been a long time since i woke up at 6.30 a.m. LOL! but anyway i was overwhelmed with excitement as i was going to meet up with Shan Miao! it's been a very long time since i've seen her. hehe. anyway, our first stop was at MPSJ to see our former Alma Mater's Sports Day. it was honestly, a total disappointment. it was the most pathetic ever Sports Day. the atmosphere that day was a total ZERO, with the attendance being like almost less than half the students in school. gwad, really sad case.

:: see, looks so empty, without Pandu Puteri, Puteri Islam and Rumah Ungu ::

all the marching teams were in a mess, both rumah sukan and badan beruniform. it was clear with evidence that all those marching participants were Form 1 or 2. gwad. there were no rumah sukan performances to the extend, how shitty, only the cheerleaders performance, but sadly, not as nice as before. sigh. and KRS, without those elite seniors, like Yoke Aun, became into a wreck, i think there were like only 12 people in the marching team. gwad! PBSM don't really need to comment too, it's deteriorating every year. LOL! maybe it was because the change of the principle last year, and everything was done last minute resulting in cutting this off and cutting that off. well, that's really too bad, fortunately we are already out of school. HAHA! =P if not there wouldn't be any fun, still reminiscing about those good old days, everything was definitely memorable!

:: sad case. LOL! ::

halfway, i smsed Yee Hong to ajak him out for a movie later on.

he replied, " Oh. Sports Day. Haha. I hope you all don't get hangus. Haha. Later i would contact you after class. Haha. Have fun BBQ there. Hahaha."
me :: =.="

anyway, me and Shan Miao were kinda avoiding the teachers. HAHA! we are such baddies. saw most of the teachers, but they didn't notice us. LOL! but we went to sit at the grandstand, because MPSJ undergone some renovation, and they built this grandstand, that's why in the pictures, there were no tents and camps for students and the participants anymore. but don't know it was fate or what, we decided to pay the toilet a visit before leaving, and damn it, our Mandarin teacher was behind us. =.=" the below expression describes all.

:: shocked faces ::

therefore, i went into the cubicle first, leaving Shan Miao outside there, and she gave me this pity face, and i said, "haha, Shan Miao, zi kei zhap shang orh." =P
and it must be karma, because when i went out, teacher was standing right outside. "uh-huh" what luck right.
so, i had no choice but to say, "Hi teacher!"
and i think she kinda can't recognize me, because she had to take one glance, before saying, "Wern Ching!..." and i can't remember what else she said. =.="
she went inside the toilet, and i faster cabut lari =P with Shan Miao. hmph, i won't forget the face that Shan Miao gave me afterwards, the smiley cunning face. LOL!

later on when we were about to leave, we bumped into our junior, Ying Ying, teehee, such a coincidence, i find it really fun and interesting to talk to her. LOL! chatting chatting chatting, then somehow, our Mandarin teacher found us. =.="
"hey, WC, you become so pretty, really"
thinks myself, "vomit vomit =P "
and there came the i-hate-very-much question, "got bf anot?"
"whaddda?? best friend? got, Shan Miao -loh =P ", i thought.
then the same old ritual question, "so what are you doing now?"
"explain explain explain"
anyway, we bumped into Pn. Belinda too, our former PJK afternoon teacher. LOL!

:: shocked again, this time, im the more freaked out one ::

about 10 a.m. we reached Sunway Pyramid and we decided to watch Long Khong 2. nope, not going to upload the gory pictures here, it's late at night, and im afraid. =P the movie was okay, all full with gory and blood and stuff. but i wanted MORE gore and blood, it wasn't really enough to fill my appetite. wakaakakaka! later, Yee Hong and Chai Yee came to join us. then we sat down at McD's and 'pat pat pat' about the teachers and funny stuff and things. LOL!

:: Yee Hong ordered 2 freaking burgers, 1 filet-o-fish and 1 spicy mcchicken deluxe ::

:: Yee Hong super hungry, nyam nyam nyam =P ::

:: eh, sengaja look away from the camera =P ::

:: found this Kungfu Panda praying mantis toy on the table and he decided to keep it ::

:: me and Yee Hong ::

:: LOL! ::

:: LOL! it's like im saying, "Nooooooo!!!" and Shan Miao is freaking cute! ::

:: me, Chai Yee and Shan Miao ::

:: Yee Hong and Shan Miao ::

:: Chai Yee and Yee Hong ::

:: our nice shoes =P ::

:: bwahaahahh!! we are too naughty, except Chai Yee, because she was quite reluctant to do it at first :: HAHA!

:: THE PROCESS OF CAMWHORING ::

:: first shot ::

:: try again, 2nd shot ::

:: eee, can't see Chai Yee's face ::

:: still can't really get it yet ::

:: ahhh, better ::

:: yes, it's quite perfect ::

:: me, Yee Hong, Chai Yee ::

:: Chai Yee and Shan Miao ::

:: me and Chai Yee ::

:: eh!! wrong take =P ::

:: LMAO!! ::

:: me, Shan Miao and Chai Yee ::

:: me and Shan Miao ::

IT WAS SUCH A FUN DAY!!!

:: out of boredness :: =P

MEMORIES I WILL ALWAYS CHERISH!! teehee!! love you guys =)

Sometimes things and stuff or even bits and pieces of what people say to me are so overrated. i don't feel at ease at all when listening to stuff like that. i don't need, "you sure get it -lah..." i lagi don't need, "you so smart, no worries..." i don't need these type of words that are so not true. i just need some motivation and encouragement, give me more of that instead of empty words that don't really mean a thing to me. i don't mean to be haughty, but all i need is just maybe "all the best!" or even "i support you!"...

1 and a half month of exams has certainly robbed my appetite off, and certainly my face complexion. i have small little pimples on my facee!! and dark circles around mt eyes!!! LOL! can't really care about that first. handling my future at just a mere age of 19 is big stuff, it's like two big boulders on my shoulders, or even a super uber huge boulder on my chest, drowning in suffocation. sigh.

the good news is i got into IMU for the February intake next year. the bad news is i don't have the mood nor the passion to study for medicine anymore. it's like everything suddenly vanished into thin air in the process of waiting for the outcome of my application. along the way of hard work with tears, sweat and even blood, thoughts appeared in my mind, thinking, is this all worthwhile? am i really fit to become what i want to be? should i take the risk?

i am an adventurer, i am a risk-taker depending on the situation. but this time, i am not everything but a person filled with confusion and even sadness. i feel so sucky.

i feel so useless.

maybe i really am.

i will not give in to fate

i will keep fighting

"do you know where the end is
do you think you can see it
until you get there
go on
go ahead and scream it" - One Republic's Say (All I Need)

"if only" is the saddest word ever

if only i had studied more :: "nah, it's too late already..."

if only i did not lie :: "there is nothing you can do about the fact that you did lie..."

if only i said that and not this :: "sigh, you can't change the things that you said..."

if only i didn't say those cruel and hurting words :: "start now by giving kind words and doing kind and compassionate things instead of reminiscing about the bad past..."

if only

sigh

if only

i have been TV deprived for one whole month!

i can't stand it already! *going crazy pulling my hair*

just one more paper to go, and then *bwaahahahahha*

then i can catch up on

House MD

CSI:NY

TVB dramas

a Taiwanese idol TV series i've been wanting to watch so long. Ethan Ruan is freaking HOT!

and well...

IMU interview

i attended the IMU interview yesterday. my first impression of IMU was the offices inside the building were pretty scattered and quite messy, but well, maybe it's because they were doing renovation that would be completed during July.

i was so nervous shit in the morning as my interview was in the afternoon. sigh. was interviewed by 1 Chinese man and 1 Indian man, both doctors, no they aren't young, in fact they looked kinda scary. lol. somebody didn't show up for the interview, so i went in earlier, as fast as possible i wanted to get the interview done and over with it.

i thought it was pretty short, not that i ain't grateful it was short, but it induced me to think, maybe they already have enough people for that intake, therefore they didn't really want to waste time 'interrogating' me with questions? sigh. i thought i was pretty calm and composed while entering the room, but then i always speak fast when im nervous. especially when they asked me to introduce myself, adrenaline was still pumping in me. ughhh.

the questions were

1. tell me about yourself. i think i shouldn't have told him that my dad works as an economist, because he asked me why do economists always say, "this might happen, or probably would happen" but never exactly say the right answer. LOL! i forgotten what i've said, but i think i should have joked and said, "so they wouldn't get into trouble for saying something that didn't happen in the end."

2. why did you choose IMU, and why medicine?

3. are you a squeamish person, like if i throw a rat at you, would you be afraid? that means you're not afraid of blood, or gory stuff?

4. did you go to the IMU's website? so, did you read about the curriculum where there's something about problem-based learning (PBL)? luckily, i had prepared for that curriculum question, so i managed to answer it, and he even said, "very good" after i explained what was PBL.

5. and then the case study. "you're a lecturer, and you have helped your students very much and they got flying colours in their exam, and now the parents want to reward you with an expensive reward, would you accept it? and why?" which i thought i pretty messed it up, because i talked before i think. ughhhh. i became nervous all of a sudden when one of them kept pestering me with questions. lol. then i had to change my decision as a consequence of my speak-before-thinking. ugghhh!!! but one of them actually said, "don't worry, you did well, you have the right to change your decision, and you showed compassion..." =.=" and then the other interviewer asked, "is RM 1 an expensive reward?" and i said, "well, it is to a poor person." and he said, "yes, thats why..."

and then that was the end of it, and they opened for questions, and i asked them 1, and they explained it to me pretty patiently. haha.

well, whatever the outcome is, but i hope i really can get it, sigh, im glad it's over now. phew!! *wipes sweat*

:: Carrie Underwood :: Inside Your Heaven

there's actually some mistake in between, but im too lazy to play it all over again and record all over again. blah. so, here goes. as usualy bad quality, hmm, maybe i should start to get a good recording camera. HAHA!

comments are gladly appreciated! thank you!

:: Jonas Brothers :: When You Look Me In The Eyes

:: Jonas Brothers :: When You Look Me In The Eyes

haven't played this song for quite a while, so it's abit rusty, especially at the bridge there. but overall, i hope it's okay. it's still flawed of course! but i was so bored that i decided to record this. bad quality as well. XD HAHA! the 2nd version is better but there are more echoes. =/

comments are of course deeply appreciated and widely welcomed! thank you!

Lyrics

If the heart is always searching,
Can you ever find a home?
I've been looking for that someone,
I'll never make it on my own.
Dreams can't take the place of loving you,
There's gotta be a million reasons why it's true

When you look me in the eyes,
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise,
When you look me in the eyes.

How long will I be waiting,
To be with you again
Gonna tell you that I love you,
In the best way that I can.
I can't take a day without you here,
You're the light that makes my darkness disappear.

When you look me in the eyes,
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise,
When you look me in the eyes.

More and more, I start to realize,
I can reach my tomorrow,
I can hold my head high,
And it's all because you're by my side.

When you look me in the eyes,
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When I hold you in my arms
I know that it's forever
I just gotta let you know
I never wanna let you go

Cause when you look me in the eyes.

And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise,
When you look me in the eyes.
Oh